Laters Baby
by Agent2cute
Summary: They say that you'll always remember your first love. *Cheat Story* HEA
1. Prologue

DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades series used in this story belongs to E.L. James

Prologue

 _How do I mend a broken heart?_

 _My entire world has fallen apart._

 _How do I find hope in a brand new day,_

 _when the one I love has gone away?_

 _My mind overflows with memories of you,_

 _of all that we've shared, all that we knew._

 _I long for your touch and your warm embrace,_

 _the look in your eyes, the smile on your face._

 _My dreams are filled with your soft gentle kiss,_

 _I wake and cry for all that I miss._

 _How do I mend a broken heart,_

 _when my one true love and I are apart?_

 _My heart knows to love only you, it won't let go, what do I do?_

 _Our moments together were precious and few,_

 _but I cherished them all more than you knew._

 _I love you, my angel, and always will._

 _I loved you then and I love you still._

 **APOV**

I have spent countless hours holding on to the memories we have shared, inspecting them, dissecting them; searching for some kind of sign of what went wrong. You told me you loved me, you told me that nothing in this world mattered as long as we were together, and I believed you. I was a fool to believe you. You hypnotized me. Your smile and the way it curled whenever I told you a corny joke. Your eyes and the way they shined with every laugh. You were it for me, and I thought I was it for you. But I wasn't. She is your happy ending, she is your siren, she is it for you, and I think the hardest part of it all is realizing that I even though she is yours I will still be waiting. I know you don't love me, and maybe you never did, but I will always love you.

Laters baby,

Ana

 **AN: Hi guys! So I have decided to try writing another fanfic. I have tried countless times to continue my other fanfic Growing Old With You, but I just can't seem to come up with any ideas for it, and it has been at this stand still for quite a while. I'm honestly not one hundred percent sure where this fanfiction is going but I am currently writing chapter one, and I'm really enjoying it. I'm hoping to post a chapter at least once a week, but I'm not going to make any promises. I know it's probably really annoying to everyone who is coming from my other fanfics, to see me start another story, but I just needed something new. I hope you enjoy it!**


	2. For the First Time

**DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades Series used in this story belongs to E.L James**

Chapter One: For the First Time

 **APOV**

 _Past/Freshman Year Semester One_

"You have my number so please remember to call me if anything goes wrong, and I mean anything. I don't care if it is one in the morning, if something happens, or if you absolutely hate it here I will be here in an instant. Okay?"

"Mom, _breathe_. I haven't even been here for 24 hours, and you're about to have aneurysm."

"I know but you're my baby. My first born my-"

"Your _only_ born, the child you spent 27 hours in labor with, I _know_ mom I've heard the same speech for 18 years. I will be _fine_ , I promise."

"Come on Carla, it's time to go."

"Okay but one more hug and kiss." As I watch my parents walk out my dorm building I can't help but feel this rush of excitement. Freshman year of college is not just another moment. It is _the_ moment, the first year of freedom, the first year of many mistakes, the first year of the rest of my life. My parents had been extremely adamant about me staying in Washington for college, but I knew Harvard was the place for me. It has an exceptional English Literature program, my best friend Kate is going here, and I don't have to worry about my parents doing any surprise visits since it is a solid plane ride away from Seattle, Washington.

I begin unpacking the rest of my clothes when I hear the door opening, and I am instantly brought into a hug by _the_ Katherine Kavanagh. Kate and I have been best friends since the first day of kindergarten. Growing up we lived a solid five minutes from each other, which conveniently led to having constant sleepovers. Sometimes I feel like people find it hard to believe that Kate and I are as close as we are. Kate is someone who can start the conversation, lead the conversation, and end the conversation, and I am surely not that person.

"Steele!" Kate begins twirling me around the middle of our dorm room while squealing at the top of her lungs. I can't help but laugh at how this probably looks like we haven't seen each other in months when in reality we haven't seen each other in a couple hours, mainly because we took two separate flights to Massachusetts. After some time Kate finally pulls apart from me.

"College!"

"I know!" I reply with a smile. After many hours of unpacking and a bittersweet goodbye to Kate's parents, Kate and I find ourselves finally settled down on top of my bed.

"Okay time to roam." Kate says as she suddenly jumping off the bed we had finally been able to lay on.

"What do you mean?" I respond as she begins lacing up her gladiator shoes, and grabbing her purse.

"Time to explore Steele. Meet knew people, hopefully some very attractive guys." She says as she raises her eyebrows up and down. She throws my shoes in my direction rushing me to get ready, and soon enough we are out of the dorm building.

"I can't believe we're here Steele. I mean _us_ as college freshman!" She begins doing a little dance as we walk our way to the closest dining hall, and let me tell you, one thing you will learn about Kate very quickly is that she is a little overdramatic. We swipe our IDs, and begin looking through the selection of food. They have a sushi bar, a wide range of fried foods, an all day waffle bar, and I am left starting to understand why the freshman 15 is a real thing. We eventually are able to select our lunches and find the closest empty table.

"Alright so I'm planning on somehow getting the invite to a party, and hopefully both our luck and good looks we will both be able to meet some gorgeous guys." I begin nodding in agreement, but that quickly stops once she continues discussing "the plan".

"Then we'll fall in love, have a few kids, white picket fence and all ... and they lived happily ever after." _What did I say … dramatic._

"Right because that's how it _always_ happens right?" I respond as I roll my eyes. I suddenly feel a crumpled up napkin hit the side of my face.

"Hey, you never know." She says then sticks her tongue out at me playfully. After lunch we find ourselves walking through the quad once again and there are even more people out. There are various activities going on, some people playing frisbee, some sunbathing, others just talking, Kate and I are in the middle of a conversation when I feel a sharp pain in the back of my head.

"What the fuck asshole!" I hear Kate scream at the Frisbee thrower who, I'm assuming, is right behind me. I'm closing my eyes, and trying to rub away the pain when all of a sudden I hear one of the most melodic voices.

"I'm really sorry, we weren't really paying attention."

"No shit asshole!" Kate responds even louder.

"Kate it's fine." I say calmly not trying to cause a scene my first day of college. I finally am able to open my eyes, and see whom the gorgeous voice belongs to. _Spoiler alert: his face is gorgeous too!_

My jaw almost drops at the sight of this guy! Frisbee-thrower is made up almost perfectly – he has this unique color of bronzed locks, a chiseled jaw, and the most captivating grey eyes. I can't help but internally gasp at him, and I'm starting to think that he's realized this because I'm beginning to notice a smirk forming.

"It-it's fine." I whisper.

"I'm Christian." He says while bringing his hand to mine, and I find myself instantly shaking it in response.

"Ana." I respond with a smile.

"Alright well Ana and I have to get back to our dorm so…" Kate says as she begins pulling at my arm.

"Right well it was nice to meet you Ana, and sorry again about your head." Christian says with a smile.

"Yeah no problem." Kate and I then begin making our way back towards our dorm building, and the whole way I can't help but think about Christian.

"Right because that _always_ happens. Right Steele?" I hear Kate tease, and I am instantly brought out of my Christian-trance.

"Shut up." I respond as I playfully elbow her in the side.

Kate was eventually able to get us an invite to a back-to-school party being hosted by a fraternity, so soon enough Kate and I found ourselves spending hours getting ready for the party. I had just finished with my makeup, when Kate finally did the finishing touches on her hair.

"So do you think you'll see Christian there?" Kate asked, making sure to sound in love when saying his name.

"Who?" I responded even though she and I both knew that I have been thinking about him ever since the Frisbee incident.

"Oh shut up Steele. You know _exactly_ who I'm talking about." I roll my eyes, as I check myself in the mirror one last time.

"Alright alright, are you ready to go?" Kate gives me a quick nod; we both put our shoes on, and head out the door.

We make our way to the party, and we know we have reached our destination for sure when we hear the extremely loud music, and see tons of people outside.

"Wow, college parties are no joke." I say quietly to Kate. She nods in response, takes my hand, and walks me into the house. Once inside we are shocked at how many more people are in the house. There is already a good amount of people drunk, and it's only 10:30 at night! Kate was able to get the details about the party by shamelessly flirting with a guy at the bookstore. She came back to our dorm room jumping up and down, textbooks in hand and all.

"Okay, I'm going to get us some drinks." Kate says, and I watch her head over to what I'm assuming is the kitchen. As I look at the crowd ahead of me I start to feel slightly overdressed. Many of the girls are wearing skimpy skirts or shorts, with tank tops so tiny they look like bras, and here I am with a slightly cropped black tank top, brown trousers, and simple black heels. Kate says I look hot, but I am starting to think otherwise. As I am just getting into the music I hear someone clearing their throat behind me. When I turn around I am both shocked, and excited.

"Frisbee thrower." I say with a slight smirk.

"Ha-ha, yeah sorry about that." I am delighted to see Christian, and I do have to say he looks _very hot_ tonight. He's wearing a red and blue plaid shirt, with some dark wash jeans that make his ass look amazing, not that I was looking or anything.

"It's really no problem Christian."

"I didn't know you would be at this party." He says while he stands next to me, also looking at the dancing crowd in front of us.

"Yeah my roommate Kate somehow got the details, so we thought why not. I mean it is our first day at college so…" _What the fuck Ana! NEVER tell a guy you're a freshman._ I can't help but internally hit myself in the face for that screw up.

"Oh you're a freshman too?"

"Um yeah, I'm an English Lit major, you?"

"I'm undecided in the business school." I honestly can't believe this guy's a _freshman_. He looks like he could pretty much be a junior right now.

"What dorm are you living in?" He asks.

"Beeson Hall."

"Oh that's awesome, I am too." He responds with a smile. I begin to say something in response when I notice that Kate has returned.

"Here you go Ana. Oh hey asshole." I give her a look, but am relieved when she winks back at me silently letting me know she is only joking.

"Kate, I'm assuming? Nice to meet you too." Christian says with a smile, as he and Kate shake hands. As I sip whatever it is that Kate has handed me, I am almost instantly hit with a very strong drink. I can't help but pull the amateur move coughing, and thankfully, instead of laughing, Christian begins patting my back in hopes of relieving my coughing fit.

"What the hell is in this Kate?" I say still trying to recover from the drink.

"Jungle juice!" My jaw almost drops at this confession; the number one thing they tell you is to _never_ drink the jungle juice because it always breaks the alcohol-mixing rule. A couple cups of this, and I will be completely shit face for sure.

"Well I'm going to go dance, want to come with or…" Before Kate can finish that sentence I try as hard as I can to hint that I want to stay with Christian. Kate thankfully gets the message, and makes her way into the crowd.

"Are you a lightweight?" Christian asks with a smirk.

"Usually I'm fine, but I've never tested my limit with jungle juice so we'll just have to wait and see." I say with a smile.

"Well hopefully I won't have to be holding your hair by the end of the night." I furrow my brows in question.

"Are you so sure you're still going to be by my side?" I challenge slightly moving closer to him. The drink must be getting to my head already, and I find myself falling into Christian, but thankfully he's fast enough and is able to catch me.

"Most definitely twinkle toes." He responds with a smile so contagious I can't help but smile in return. _Who is this man?_

 **AN: Pinterest page specifically for this fanfiction:** **sadepram/laters-baby/** **. Until next time!**


	3. It's Quiet Uptown

DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades Series used in this story belongs to E.L James

Chapter Two: It's Quiet Uptown

 **APOV**

 _Present/2015_

"Alright a couple more boxes and we're all set!" Kate says excitedly. I give a soft smile to her, and bring the last of my boxes into my new room. Kate and I decided that since it is our senior year, we should probably get an apartment rather than stay in the dorms. While they aren't cheaper, we don't have to worry about any annoying freshman, and I don't have to worry about ever running into _him_. Kate has been really helpful this summer, ever since what happened. I pretty much owe her for everything that she has done for me these past couple months.

"Steele?" I am suddenly brought out of my thoughts, and when I am finally able to focus I notice Kate is in front of me.

"What did you say?" I ask quietly.

"Are you okay?" Kate says concerned. I just nod, give her another one of my small smiles, and settle my boxes onto my bed that thankfully got here a couple days before we officially moved in. I know I haven't been the same, and I really am trying to get my life back in focus, my priorities straight. But I can't help myself. Everything reminds me of him, and coming back to school hasn't made it any easier. Everything around here reminds me of us, and it will take a long time before those memories fade, if they ever do.

"Ana." Kate responds with the tone that she knows I'm not okay.

"Just leave it Kate!" I yell. I soon realize that Kate is only trying to help, and there is no reason for me yelling at her. Like I said, she's been amazing, and there's no point in me taking it all out on her.

"Please?" I say quietly. She nods, tells me she is getting the rest of her stuff, and heads out the door. I head over to my box, and begin unloading my clothes. During this task I am brought back to the first day of freshman year, it was definitely a different experience from this one. I feel like I was a completely different person during that time.

We thankfully finish setting up both of our rooms a couple hours later, and soon enough we are each drinking a glass of wine while relaxing on the couch. The cable and Internet is not couple until Friday, and it is only Tuesday, so until then we will just have to entertain ourselves. Kate's phone ends up ringing, and she heads over to answer it. I notice that when she looks to see who it is she looks up at me. I just pretend that I don't notice her worried glances at me.

"Hey Elliot." Elliot and Kate have been going strong since Kate's freshman year, and Elliot's junior year. Even though Elliot is back in Seattle, he still makes sure to call Kate every single day. When he's not too busy he'll facetime her, and there have been many occasions where flowers will randomly be delivered. While Kate seems to talk to Elliot every day, I haven't talked to him in months. Elliot and I used to talk just as much as she and Elliot do, but not because I have any types of feelings for him. Elliot is like a brother to me. He has helped me on many days that _he_ couldn't. I wish that I could see Elliot, or even talk to him, but it is just too hard right now.

"Alright love you too. Bye." I am pulled out of my thoughts at the end of Kate's conversation.

"Elliot is just finishing up with his family." I nod thinking that Kate is finished with what she has to say.

"He wants to come over." I instantly look up at her, my face emotionless.

"What do you think?" She asks.

"You can invite him over, I'll just hang out at the Starbucks or something."

"No Ana, I'm not going to make you leave just because my boyfriend wants to come over."

"And I don't want my best friend to have to choose her roommate over her boyfriend." Kate grabs my hand and looks at me sincerely.

"Best friend Ana, not just a roommate." I nod.

"How about I just hang out in my room when he comes over? Then we both get what we want." Kate agrees to the compromise, and soon enough I am in my room setting up a few more things, while Elliot and Kate are talking in the living room. After a couple of hours I begin feeling hungry, and realize that I am going to have to come face to face with Elliot. I decide to put my big girl pants on, and head out to the kitchen. Once I am out there all of the talking has stopped. I decide to just make a peanut butter and jelly sandwich because it is easy, and will get me out of this room a little faster.

"Ana?" I don't want to look up, but know that it would be rude not to. I look up to see Elliot in front of me with the tiniest smile.

"Hey Elliot." I murmur. I am not surprised at how he hasn't changed one bit, his hair is still as long, and blond as it was a couple months ago. It may even be a little longer, now that I'm thinking about it. I can feel Elliot's eyes watching me as I make my sandwich.

"Yes?" I say while still focusing on my sandwich.

"So how are you?" He asks. _Really Elliot?_ He can tell that I am just as annoyed as head-voice Ana, and tries to recover from his stupid question.

"Right." He turns to go back to Kate who is wearing a saddened expression, and I believe it's for both Elliot and I. I know it must be hard for her, she doesn't want to choose her boyfriend over her best friend, but she doesn't want to lose me either. As I make my way back my room with my sandwich in my hand, I hear Elliot's voice once again.

"You know he really misses you Ana." I can't help but feel an immense amount of anger at Elliot's words even though I know he is just trying to help. I think Kate is realizing this too because she quickly tries to get Elliot to shut up.

"Misses me?" I murmur while slowly turning around to face him.

"He's going crazy Ana, I'm really worried about him." He says worriedly.

"You're worried about _him_. Him! He did this to himself Elliot, and if he didn't want this all to happen he should have never-" I have to take about 3 deep breaths before continuing because I know I'm going to say something stupid, and in the end the only person who will get hurt is Kate.

"He broke my heart Elliot. He made the choice, and in the end it was a very stupid one … one that _he made_. Now I'm just going to give you the benefit of the doubt because I know he's your brother, and you don't deserve this to get between your relationship. Just … please don't talk about him anymore okay? I've spent the past three months trying to get over it, and I don't need anymore reminders on how stupid I was." Elliot nods at my words, and I notice a few tears at the surface of his eyes. _Oh Lelliot_.

"Okay … I understand." Before I know it Elliot gets up and has me in a tight hug.

"Love you bonanza." He whispers.

"Love you too Lelliot." I know this is a nickname _he_ gave to Elliot, but after you hear it for four years you can't help but tag along.

 _Two Days Later_

"So I think we should try to do all black frames in the living room, and hallways. It would give this modern, but chic kind of feel you know?"

"Yeah." I respond even though both Kate and I know I'm barely paying attention. Shopping hasn't always been my forte, and I quickly learned between our friendship that Kate _loves_ shopping, so every once and I while I will tag along to make her happy.

"Steele! This is your apartment too, I can't be the only one making the decisions." Kate says while looking through the different style picture frames.

"I know I know, I just don't see the point of paying attention to every single detail, especially the picture frames." I say while rolling my eyes.

"Because having all different types of picture frames looks tacky." Kate says, and I can't help but roll my eyes again while she sticks her tongue out playfully at me. We have gone through a dozen types of picture frames before settling on a set, and now we are looking through the kitchen supplies. It hasn't been too easy cooking with plastic utensils, and since I'm the one who mainly cooks between the two of us, I'm pretty excited to move on to this stuff.

"Alright so what color scheme should we go for?" Kate asks while looking through the different types of spatulas, mainly looking at the color rather than the quality.

"For the kitchen?" I ask, looking at her like she has two heads.

"Steele! Get it _together_." I can't help but laugh at the frustration I am causing her.

"Okay okay, _sorry_. How about we do all silver utensils, with black cooking tools, and then choose a color for the bowls, and stuff?" I suggest.

"Wow Steele, first smart thing you've said today." She teases, and I can't help but nudge her shoulder. We have finally settled on a turquoise green for the plates, and are finally making our way to the register. I know that it is going to be quite the receipt. As we wait in line I look around the story, and what I see causes me to instantly duck.

"What the hell are you doing Steele?" I pull Kate down with me.

"Shhh!" I whisper to her.

"Why are we whisper?" She says with a confused look on her face.

"Leila's here." I tell her. I instantly feel my heart starting to tear … I haven't felt this much pain since that night.

"Christian's Leila?" Her words cause the sob that I've been trying so hard to hide come out. She brings me into her arms and holds me while we wait in line, we must look absolutely crazy but we don't care. We are finally able to check out without being noticed by her, and make our way to Kate's car.

"What the fuck is she doing here!" Kate screams once we're in the car.

"She goes here Kate." I remind her solemnly.

"I'm so sorry Ana." Kate whispers while grabbing my hand.

"It's fine … _he_ chose her. Christian chose her." We make our way back to the apartment in a much different mood than before. She looks exactly the same way she did when I met her; I begin to laugh when making a mental note. Kate looks over to me like I'm absolutely insane, which I bet is how I look right now.

"What Steele?" She asks.

"At least this time she has clothes on." I say, and when I look back at Kate she once again has a frown on her face. _Same here Kate, same here._

 **AN: I have a pinterest board for this story and it is** _ **Laters Baby**_ **by Sade Pram. Until next time!**


	4. I Remember That Night

DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades Series used in this story belongs to E.L James

Chapter Three: I Remember That Night

 **APOV**

 _Past/Freshman Year Semester Two_

"Please tell me you're going to the party tonight?" Kate asks right when she walks into our dorm room. I sigh loudly because I had just started resting after a long week of classes.

"I wasn't really thinking about it." I say while stretching in my bed.

"But we have to celebrate." I stop mid-stretch completely confused about Kate's statement.

"What are you talking about Kavanagh? Celebrate what?"

"Our first week of second semester classes being finished of course!" I can't help but roll my eyes at the absurdness within that statement. Kate will find any excuse to party, she must of gave the reason "because it's (day of the week)" a million times.

"Come on Steele, maybe you'll see _Christian_ there." I can already feel my heart racing at just his name, and Kate knows this.

Christian and I immediately exchanged numbers at that first party, and ever since then, we have been talking non-stop. Even though he is a business major, and I am an English major, it wasn't that hard working around each other's schedules to hang out. It also wasn't that hard because Christian and I ended up being in the same introductory English course last semester.

 _First Day of Classes Last Semester_

 _I had already been through 3 classes today, and my energy was quickly running out. Although I stopped myself from being too tired because it had finally come to the time where I got to come to my favorite course, Introduction to English. This course was pretty much one that was going over the basics, but I was still extremely excited to get back into the books, and writing._

 _Since this was an introductory course, which meant that it was pretty much an all freshman course, the classroom was a huge lecture hall. I decided on sitting in the middle, not wanting to seem like that teacher's pet who sits in the front, and knowing that I could never sit in the way back._

 _I had just finished placing my "note-taking set up" in front of me, which consisted of a notebook, couple of pencils, and extra erasers, when I heard someone clearing their throat next to me. I thought this was a sign to move out of the way, but when I looked up I was in complete shock to see Christian Grey smiling down at me._

" _Funny running into you here." He says as he sits in the seat next to mine._

 _I find myself blushing, and soon realize that this is now an unfortunate routine whenever I see Christian. I continue to stare at him as he places his black laptop in front of him, and as I compare my set up to his I begin feeling insecure about the immense amount of things in front of me. Going for the teacher's pet look without even trying Ana?_

" _I hope no one is sitting here." Christian says, and I begin wondering why. It's because you're staying at him like a freak Steele!_

" _Oh no you're fine!" I respond while smiling, hoping that I don't look like a complete idiot. Class goes by quickly since it is my favorite course. The professor is absolutely amazing, and after just going through the syllabus, I know it's going to be a great semester. During class I found myself looking at Christian every so often, and I hope that he didn't notice._

" _So why are you in an English course Mr. business major?" I ask as we both walk out of the lecture hall._

" _It's unfortunately one of our requirements." He says with a smirk._

" _Hey! Not the smartest thing to say to an English major." I respond while nudging his shoulder with mine._

" _Yeah you're probably right." He responds while nudging me back._

" _So where are you headed next?" Christian asks while continuing to walk next to me._

" _Well I'm done for the day, so probably dinner." I respond nonchalantly._

" _Oh okay, is Kate coming?" I smile inwardly knowing exactly where this conversation is heading. Alright Steele, time to grow some balls._

" _No, but if you're done you can come with?" Christian agrees, and we begin heading our way to our building's dining hall. We both go our separate ways when selecting a dinner, but come back together at a table that Christian finds._

" _So where is_ the _Anastasia Steele from?" Christian asks while we're both eating our dinner._

" _How did you know my full name?" I say curiously._

" _Well I was just guessing that Ana was short for something, and every time you're around Kate she calls you Steele, so it was pretty obvious on what your last name is." Christian says with a smile, and I can't help but smile in return._

" _Well I live with my dad in Seattle, Wa-"_

" _You have got to be kidding me."_

" _What?" I ask not knowing what I did wrong._

"I'm _from Seattle, Washington." Wait what?_

" _Wait what?" My mouth almost completely falls open._

" _Yeah … wow, what a small world." He says with a smile._

" _Yeah." I whisper while smiling back at him._

Present Day

"Steele!" Kate yells which pulls me out of my thoughts.

"What?" I groan, knowing that I am going to end up at a party tonight.

"Party. Now. Put on the dress." I playfully roll my eyes and grab the dress Kate has thrown onto my bed. I do have to say I am pretty excited to wear this dress.

Kate picked it out for me a couple years ago, and it is still my favorite dress to this day. It is a tight fit black dress, with a deep V-neck, and a couple of sheer cut outs. I don't wear it often, but when I do I feel _amazing_. Kate and I end up getting ready fairly quickly and before I know it we are already at the party.

This time we ended up getting the invite to a party being hosted by the football team at our school, and it is the biggest party I have seen this whole year. There has to be at least 200 people here! Kate and I make sure to hold onto each other as we make it inside the house, because we both know that if either of us let go we are done for. We finally get situated and eventually have a drink in our hands. As Kate is talking to me about classes I find myself recognizing a person on the other side of the room.

"Kate!" I whisper/scream, which immediately causes her to stop mid-sentence.

"What?" She says concerned.

"Don't turn around but guess who is here?" I say almost jumping up and down from excitement.

"Who?" Kate responds as she tries to turn around to see, but I grab her arms so she is not able to.

"Elliot! And didn't I say not to turn around?" Kate begins to blush just at his name, and I am almost in shock because trust me when I tell you that Katherine Kavanagh does _not_ blush.

I feel my heart begin to race, because I know that if Elliot is here, Christian has to be too. Elliot happens to be the other extremely hot Grey brother. I met him last semester when Christian and I were working on our English papers together, and I knew that he was perfect for Kate.

Kate eventually got to meet him too at another party, and they ended up exchanging numbers. They have been very flirty with one another, but I have yet to hear if anything else has happened. I begin to smile when I notice that Elliot has noticed both Kate and I, and has decided to come over.

"Spill Steele! What's happening?"

"Don't freak out, but he's coming over here."

"What!" Kate screams.

"Didn't I say not to freak out?" I respond. Before Kate can say anything else Elliot is here.

"Hey, I didn't think you guys would be here?" Elliot says with a megawatt smile. By the look of Kate's face, you would think that she just came.

"Yeah we had some free time, so we thought why not." I responded since Kate was clearly unable to.

"Nice." Elliot said, and then began to look at Kate in hopes that she would say something. Elliot Grey looks absolutely _nothing_ like Christian. For one, he has short blonde hair, and bright blue eyes, while Christian has much darker locks and grey eyes.

Although their outward appearances are different, I could tell from the few times that I hung out with them, that they are very similar. I try to elbow Kate to get her to speak, and sigh in relief when she finally realizes how crazy she looks.

"Do you want to dance? I absolutely love this song." Kate says with a smile. I'm about to say something because I know that we both have no idea what this song is, but I quickly realize what she's doing. Elliot agrees and begins following her to where the music is playing, but suddenly he stops and turns around to look at me.

"Christian should be in the kitchen." I look at him in question wondering how he could possibly know that I want to see Christian, but all he does is smirk and goes back to following Kate. _Great so everyone who could possible know, knows I have a thing for Christian._ I make my way to the kitchen, and am happy to see Christian. As I make my way towards him I notice that he is talking to some guys who I am guessing are on the football team.

"Hey stranger." I whisper behind him, and once he has turned around and noticed that it is me he is all smiles.

"Tink!" Just by the way he is acting I can tell he is a little buzzed. Ever since that first party Christian has been calling me twinkle toes, and apparently that nickname is too long so he has shortened it to Tink, which makes absolutely no sense, but that's Christian Grey logic for you.

"What are you doing here?" He says excitedly.

"Can't a girl party?" I respond.

"How have you been? I feel like I haven't seen you in forever." Christian says while refilling my drink.

"Good getting excited for the year to end."

"The semester just started!"

"And so has my countdown!" I respond slightly mocking him.

"Come on it can't be that bad."

"You're right it could be worse without you." I don't even notice what I said until it is already out there. _What is in this drink?!_

Those two drinks that I had ended up becoming close to 10 drinks, and Christian and I are equally drunk. We end up outside somehow, and I am completely oblivious to where both Kate and Elliot could possibly be.

"You did not!" I scream while laughing incredibly hard at Christian's confession.

"I did! I'm think that I'm going to walk into Elliot's room with him on his computer, but next thing I know he's but naked behind some girl!" I grab my stomach in blissful pain from laughing so hard. This probably wouldn't be as funny if we weren't drunk, but right now it is absolutely hilarious.

I grab onto Christian's hand for support, and before I know it, his lips are crashed onto mine. My hands instantly find their way into his hair, and begin tugging at his locks. As they tug, Christian lets out a moan, and I return with one once he grips my waist closer to his. Christian's lips travel down to my neck, and I can't help but moan even louder. My hands make their way from his hair down to his crotch, and I begin rubbing my hands up and down his now very prominent erection. My actions cause Christian to pull away from my neck, and we are now eye to eye.

"Fuck Ana. Do you want to get out of here?" He whispers. I can't find my voice, so I just nod. I text Kate quickly letting her know where I am, and I follow Christian back to our dorm. _What are you getting yourself into Ana?_

 **AN: Thanks for your amazing reviews. Until next time!**


	5. I Just Might Regret That Night

DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades Series used in this story belongs to E.L James

Chapter Four: I Just Might Regret That Night

 **APOV**

 _2015_

This nostalgic feeling enters my stomach as I make my way to the English department building. It's the feeling you get ever time the months of August and September roll around. Your stomach begins to coil, your hands begin to clam up, and your heart skips a beat with every step you take. _First day of classes_. The only thing different, I suppose, is the fact that as I make my way to the bricked-building I will no longer receive a kiss goodbye, or a "see you after class." This time I walk alone.

These last couple of months have been hard on me. I've spent my summer enduring the same routine: wake up, cry, try to eat, cry, sleep, cry, repeat. But this month will be different then all the others. My world no longer stops for him. My tears no longer fall for him. _I_ no longer live for him.

As I enter my first class of senior year, I notice how much smaller the rooms are now that I am getting deep into my major. I am no longer staring at a lecture hall filled with anxious students wondering what their first day of college classes will be like, instead I am facing a small room filled with fifteen to twenty students anxiously waiting for what the rest of their life is going to become. I have decided to take a classical literature course since it is the type of literature I am most fond of. I've had this professor before, and I have always enjoyed his teaching style.

As I make my way inside the classroom, I decide on sitting in the middle. This placement has always been the best for me, not too close, but not too far. I set up my laptop, and decide to go through my phone as I wait for the rest of the students to file in.

"Is this seat taken?" I look up to see if whomever is talking, is talking to me. My eyes are brought to a very attractive man with dirty blonde hair and an extremely sweet smile. I can't help by shake my head, and smile in return.

"Um … no it's all yours." I move my chair over a little bit so that this attractive stranger could sit down beside me. Once he has sat down, and taken all of his note-taking materials out, he turns and faces me with a mega-watt smile.

"I'm Luke Sawyer, but a lot of my friends call me Sawyer."

"Anastasia Steele, but a lot of my friends call me Ana." Sawyer still has this immense smile, and I can't help but smile back. There's something refreshing and contagious about being with him.

"So you're a senior?" Sawyer asks as he opens his laptop. I nod in response.

"Well I'm one too, and what I'm really confused about is how I've never seen you. I mean I surely wouldn't forget meeting a beautiful girl like you." I can't help but blush at his statement. _Where did this guy come from?_

Sawyer and I continue our conversation until the professor walks it. First day of classes always consist of the same things: brief discussion on what the class will consist of, passing out of the syllabus, an awkward ice breaker activities, and the professor answering whatever questions the students may have. At the end of class, Sawyer and I gather our things, and walk out of the classroom together.

"Any more classes today?" Sawyer asks as we make our way out of the English Department.

"Nope, just one on Monday, Wednesdays and Fridays." I respond.

"That's nice. Well I just have one more around four, so do want to get lunch together?" I can't help but smile in response. Sawyer recommends going to this new pizza place that just opened up this year, so we head to that restaurant. We both order a couple slices of pizza, and I find a place for us to sit while Sawyer gets our drinks.

"Thanks." I mumble, mid-chew. _Nice Steele_. Throughout the lunch date, if you want to call it that, Sawyer tells me about his family. Surprisingly he lives in a town in Oregon that is not too far from Washington. He has one younger brother who's still in high school, and his parents have been happily married for many years. We talk about school, about home, about a lot of things actually, and I almost lose track of time. By the two-hour mark I realize I should probably head back to the apartment.

"So I'll see you Wednesday?" Sawyer asks after we both throw out our trash, and head out of the restaurant.

"Yeah." We are both standing in front of the restaurant unsure of what to do.

"Or we could see each other tomorrow night? Maybe 8-ish?" Sawyer whispers, and I can't help but smile at the slight blush he has.

"Ye-yeah sure." We exchange phone numbers, and I can't help but walk with a little more pep in my step.

"I can't believe you have a date Steele." Kate sighs.

"Trust me … I am just as surprised as you are." Kate and I are currently watching tv, each holding a carton of our favorite ice creams. I don't know why they call it the freshman 15 because I swear every year I come back I gain at _least_ five unwanted pounds.

"So he must be cute."

"He _is_." I say with a blush. I couldn't help but think about him for the rest of the day. This is the first time in awhile that I have been truly happy, and trust me when I say that there's something empowering about being wanted.

"Wow Steele. I'm so happy for you." Kate says with a smile, and I flash her a smile in return. For the rest of the night we can't help ourselves, but talk about my future date: what I'm going to wear, if I'm going to let Kate do my makeup, where we might go, if I'm going to let Kate do my makeup,etc.

It's already Tuesday, and my palms have been extremely clammy all day. I haven't had a first date in a really long time, and I can't help but wonder if I'm going to blow it. Will I talk about myself too much? How much cash should I bring? Did I give him the right number? What if he gets lost? What if h-

"Ms. Steele?" My english professor's stern voice pulls me out of my chaotic thoughts.

"Yes?" I murmur.

"I see that you have something more important to think about than this class." I feel my cheeks heat up full force at her statement. This particular english class focuses on the technicalities of english literature, and it is definitely _not_ the highlight of my Tuesdays and Thursdays. I've had this professor before, and she always seems to have a stick up her ass no matter what the day is. I try to hide myself behind my hair for the rest of class, then when we are dismissed I book it to the apartment.

By the time I get there I have T-minus 3 hours to get myself ready … physically _and_ mentally. Kate gets back to the apartment at around 7:00 so she is able to curl my hair, and do a my makeup. Thank god Kate is into that stuff, and really knows how to do it because if it was me than it would turn out to be a hot mess. We decided to do a pretty natural eye look, with a bold red lip. I wasn't too sure about it, but Kate told me to trust her, and I sure do. The dress I picked out to wear is one that I haven't worn in a while. It is a nude dress, that is covered in black lace, and it is one of my absolute favorite dresses to wear. No matter what mood I'm in, it somehow always finds a way to make me feel my best. After Kate, and I are finished with my look, I go and stand in front of my full length mirror to see how I look all together.

"You look hot Steele." Kate says with a smile. She is wearing this proud mom facial expression, and I can't help but laugh. I walk over to Kate, and give her a huge hug.

"Thanks Kavanagh." I whisper.

"No problem Steele." Kate whispers back. Kate and I have been through alot together, and I honestly don't know what I would do without her. This summer was one of the hardest ones for me, and Kate was by my side every single day. And here she is again, coming to the rescue, to make sure that I feel and look my best tonight.

We both turn towards the door at the sound of the bell, then look back at each other and squeal. By the way we're acting you would think this was my first date, and we were pre-teens. I rush over to the door while Kate is spraying me with some perfume. I then stop, take a few deep breaths to calm myself, and pull open the door. The smile that was on my face just a second ago has quickly transformed into a frown, and my stomach that was filled with butterflies is now tied in knots, and I'm not too sure if I will or will not throw up in a second.

"Christian?"

 **AN: dun Dun DUN! Sorry for the cliff hanger, but when I thought about this chapter I felt like it had to be done. Also I definitely need to apologize for being M.I.A. trust me when I say it's not because I wanted to be. This story is taking a lot out of me creatively, and it takes me a really long time to plan out and write the chapters. I feel like I am constantly writing and erasing when it comes to this story, so please don't be too mad because I really do want to post more frequently, it's just taking me some time. Sorry that this chapter is so short, I'm hoping that my next chapters will be MUCH longer. Wow, a lot of apologies this author's note. Also the chapter titles for these past two chapters are lyrics from the song "Satisfied" in** _ **Hamilton**_ **the musical. I'm completely** _ **obsessed**_ **with that show so I had to do it. Until next time!**


	6. The Morning After

DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades Series used in this story belongs to E.L James

Chapter Five: The Morning After

 **APOV**

 _2012_

As I wake up I can't help but let out a moan. _Everything_ hurts, and the fact that my dorm lights are still on doesn't make it any better. It's not until I turn to my right and see a body next to me that I realize that I'm not in my dorm room. I instantly sit up, and my movement causes the body to let out a moan as well.

"Do you have to move so fast?" My eyes bug out of my head because I instantly know who this body belongs to.

"Christian?" I whisper quietly.

"Who else would it be?" He responds while turning his head to face me. It's not until his eyes lower that I realize that I'm in fact naked … well almost naked, the bottom half of my dress is still on. My cheeks begin to heat up as I quickly grab his comforter and pull it up towards my chest.

"It's not like I haven't seen it before." Christian says while sitting up, and rubbing his face.

"Did we?" I ask nervously.

"No but obviously we did some other stuff." I hit his shoulder playfully as he smirks at me.

 _Last Night_

" _Mmmm." Christian moans as I grind against his core. Christian's back is pressed against the wall as I am held in his arms rocking my warm center against his erection._

" _Fuck Anastasia, if you don't stop this might end sooner than we want." His whispers in my ear as I suck on his neck._

" _What if I don't want to stop?" I tease, winking at him playfully. To my disappointment, Christian sets me down, grabs my hand, and begins walking me to his twin-sized bed. When he looks and sees me pouting he begins to laugh._

" _Don't worry Anastasia, I just thought it might be easier to do this on the bed." He winks, as he pulls me in front of him, and lays me on the bed. I smile once he is on top of me, and kissing my neck that I have exposed for him. I have been feeling the alcohol in my system ever since we left the party, but I can definitely feel the effects the strongest in this moment. From Christian's lips, to his hand rubbing my center, every sensation is beginning to blur._

" _Christiannnn" I moan loudly. After I let out that great moan his lips instantly find their way to mine._

" _Shhh Tink, if you want this to continue so badly we're going to have to be just a little bit considerate of our neighbors." I smile obnoxiously back at him after that comment. He is beginning to unzip the back of my dress when a knock at the door stops us._

" _Fuck." He whispers._

" _It's alright, just check it out and I'll be waiting for you here." I say and quickly give him a little peck on his lips, which are now pouting._

" _Fine, but no falling asleep Tink you got me?" He says in all seriousness._

" _Yeah yeah just go answer the door."_

" _I'm not kidding, your eyes are already half-closed."_

" _I'm_ fine _Christian now go before they decide to break the door down." He rolls his eyes and gives me a kiss, then heads towards the door. I can't help but smile at how delicious his ass looks in those jeans of his as he talks to the mystery person at the door. His conversation seems to be far from over, and as I stare at the back of him I can't help but feel my eyelids begin to close. Before I know it, everything goes black._

 _Present Day 2012_

"I fell asleep." I whisper shamefully as everything comes back to me.

"Yeah I knew you would. Guess you're just a really bad lightweight." He smirks.

"Hey! I'm not a light weight." I respond with my eyebrows furrowed. Christian then surprises me by kissing the area right in-between my two eyebrows.

"Yeah you are, but you're also cute. We always have next time." He says while getting up, and putting on a shirt that I just noticed he must have taken off in the middle of the night.

"Wait … next time?" I ask stunned.

"Yeah Tink. Now are we getting breakfast or what?" He says with a playful smile. _You don't have to ask me twice_.


	7. Author's Note

*** Check out the newest chapter of** _ **Laters Baby**_ **which was JUST posted**

 **AN: BIG AUTHOR'S NOTE!**

 **So I know that I haven't been on in a while (over 4 months to be exact) but I do have some reasons for my absence. School has been kicking my butt lately, and while I did have a Winter break, a majority of it was just catching up on sleep. I have been receiving your private messages, and I do hear you. There is no excuse for me uploading this story and then just leaving it on a cliffhanger (I literally hate when authors do this, ESPECIALLY when I'm really into their stories!)**

 **So I am going to TRY to be more consistent, but in order for that to happen the chapters are going to have to be a lot shorter (for example chapter 5 which I just posted). I can't spend as much time as I did for the first few chapters because I just don't have the time. School will always come first for me, but I do love this story and understand how many of you do too. I hope we can all come to a compromise, and you guys forgive me for this very LONG break. I am hoping to post at least once a week (I'm still deciding on which day), but please understand these chapters aren't going to be super long. I want this story to be amazing, and if I'm just focusing on quantity over quality it won't be. Again thank you to those who are still sticking along for the ride I really do appreciate it. Until next time!**


	8. Say Something

DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades Series used in this story belongs to E.L James

Chapter Six: Say Something

 **APOV**

 _Present/2015_

"What are you doing here Christian?" I whisper, not even sure if he can hear my frailed voice. My breath shortens with each second that we stare at one another in silence.

"Christian." I say more firmly, in hopes that I will get his attention, and the answer to my question.

"Tink -"

"No! You're not allowed to call me that anymore, we're not friends anymore." I yell. I slam the door and walk away while angrily wiping my tears. I don't understand how just hearing that nickname was able to bring tears to my eyes. I begin walking towards my bedroom when I hear the knocking yet again, and this time it is even harder.

"What Christian?!" I huff while crossing my arms across my chest.

"I've been trying to call you Tin … Ana. You changed your number?" He says softly while pulling at his hair, a habit I used to adore once upon a time.

"Yeah well with everything tha-that's happened it just made the most sense." I respond while looking down at my heels.

"I just _really_ needed to talk to you." This comment makes me even more furious. How is he going to put the blame on me?

"Christian, all of this isn't my fault. _You_ were the one that lied. _You_ were the one that couldn't keep it in your pants. And _I_ was the one who fell for all of your tricks." I yell, getting angrier at that fact that these tears are yet again appearing.

"Why wasn't I enough for you Christian?" I whisper. I'm surprised to see Christian looking as broken as I feel. _How is this affecting him so much? Why does any of this matter to him?_

"Ana it was a mistake, I still lo-"

"No Christian! A mistake is standing me up on a date, a mistake is forgetting my favorite type of ice cream. Sleeping with another woman while you're already in an almost 4 year relationship is _not_ a mistake. It doesn't even come close!" My makeup is already passed ruined, and I don't even care. I feel like my heart is going to beat out of my chest. _Why does he do this to me?_ I had spent all of those summer days trying to get over him, and he thinks he can just waltz back into my life.

"I need you to leave Chris-Christian." I whimper.

"Ana please just hear me out." I repeatedly shake my head "no".

"Ana just let me explain … please." His voice cracks at that last word, and I think I can feel my heart shattering simultaneously.

"Goodbye Christian." I respond while closing the door, but his foot is in the way before it can fully shut.

"Anastasia Steele I am still in love with you. What happened last year was a mistake, a _huge_ one, but please don't forget that I am still here. That I still want you like I did all of those years before. All I'm asking for is a _chance_." I stare in silence at him, and the tears that are now falling down his face. I give the slightest nod, close the door completely, and make my way to my bathroom.

I'm not shocked to see mascara stains all along my face, with my under eyes having this familiar puffiness that I experienced all last summer. There's a knock at my door, but I just stay staring at my face, at the girl I can't even recognize.

"Steele?" I let out a sigh of relief knowing that it's just Kate.

"Steele? Sawyer's here." She whispers, and just by the tone of her voice I know she has already let him in. I take in a big breath, salvage whatever makeup I can, and open the door. _It's time to put your big girl pants on Steele._

 **AN: Hope you enjoyed this week's chapter, it sure was a heart-wrenching one for me. Until next time!**


	9. Spicing Things Up

DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades Series used in this story belongs to E.L James

Chapter Seven: Spicing Things Up

 **APOV**

 _Past/Sophomore Year Semester Two_

"Blue or Black?" I ask while holding up the two fitted dresses, one in each hand.

"Neither." I huff at Christian's response. He continues to smirk at me, while making his way towards me. He then presses his chest against my back, and begins kissing my neck, which causes me to automatically moan in pleasure.

"This meeting is really important Christian." I whisper, no longer sounding as determined as I was just a few seconds ago. I watch in the mirror as he travels one of his hands down the center of my body, to my cloth-covered heat. I whimper as he pulls the thin material to the side, and runs his fingers up and down my lower lips.

"Fuck Christian." He puts one finger inside me, and begins pumping. Then soon enough he adds another, as his other unoccupied hand runs up and down my side. I feel the tension building inside me as he pumps in and out.

"Cum for me Ana." He whispers, and with that I explode.

"CHRISTIAN!" I scream. He slowly brings me back down, while rubbing my sides, and giving me kisses along my neck. I open my eyes, which I now realized I must've shut in the middle of everything. I smile at the sight of the two of us together in the mirror.

"Black, Tink." Christian murmurs, and walks back over to our full-sized bed. I can't help but laugh at this ridiculous man.

"Come on Ana!" Kate groans as we walk to the school's parking lot.

"I can't Kate, you know that Christian and I had plans for tonight." I remind her.

"I _know_ , but it's Friday and we haven't gone to a party together in forever!" I can't help but roll my eyes at Kate's ridiculousness.

"We went to a party together two weeks ago Kate. TWO WEEKS!" I laugh, as I begin unlocking my car.

"Well … yeah, but we have to go to another one. This is college Ana, and ever since you and Chris got that apartment together, I feel like we never see each other on the weekends." Kate says while giving me one of her over-dramatic pouts.

"First of all, he doesn't like to be called Chris and you know this. And next week I _promise_ you and I will go to a party okay?" And with that Kate's pout is replaced with a megawatt smile. We exchange one last hug, and both make our ways off campus.

Christian and I decided last semester to get an apartment together off campus for our sophomore year. We realized it was the best decision since we were together almost every single day, and eventually Kate was getting a little annoyed of walking in on us. We found this beautiful apartment about 10 minutes away from the campus, and it's just perfect. It's been amazing being able to live with Christian, and not worry about getting "caught" or getting in trouble from taking a shower together. _Although the angst did make the sex even more amazing._

As I walk into our apartment I notice that all of the lights are turned off, which I find confusing since Christian was supposed to be here before me. I turn on the lights and gasp at the sight in front of me. Christian some how made a fort in the middle of our living room, with sparkling lights running up and down the poles, as well as pillows lining up against the sides of it.

"Happy Friday baby." I turn to my right and notice Christian there with a bottle of wine, and a picnic basket in both of his hands. I instantly run up to him, and press my lips against his.

"What's all this?" I ask with tears in my eyes.

"Well I know that you were really stressed this week with all of your midterms, so I thought I would surprise you." He says, and I can't help but giggle at the slight blush that has come across his face.

"Well I love it." I say, and kiss him once more.

"Where'd you get the wine?" I ask.

"Elliot." Christian laughs. We begin eating the dinner he's prepared for us, which is, pasta alfredo with grilled chicken. I close my eyes, and moan at how delicious the food is. When I open them I see that Christian's eyes had darken.

"What?" I ask playfully.

"You know what Anastasia." He murmurs. I instantly feel myself get wet at his tone of voice. We spend the rest of dinner sexually tense. I've noticed the bulge forming in Christian's pants every time I look down, and he must know how I'm feeling at this moment. After we finish dinner, Christian stands up, and reaches for me.

"Come with me." He whispers. I grab his hand, and follow him into our room. The first thing I notice are not the rose petals spread across the floor, or the various candles on our dresser, but instead it is the blindfold and rope lying against my pillow.

"What's this?" I whisper while continuously staring at the strange objects.

"I want to try something with you Anastasia, but if you don't want to it's fine." He says pulling my face towards him so that I can see how sincere he is.

"Try what?" I ask. He walks me over to the bed.

"You trust me right?" He asks with a worried tone in his voice.

"Of course." I whisper. Christian picks up the blindfold and hands it to me. I realize what he wants me to do with it, and I put it over my eyes, which causes it to completely block my vision. I feel Christian's hand as he grabs me, and lays me on the bed.

"Put your arms above your head." He whispers, and I do as he asks.

"I'm going to tie you up okay?" I nod in response, and suddenly feel the rope getting tied around my wrists. Once he has finished tying them I try to pull, and notice that he must've tied my hands to the bedposts.

"Is this okay?" He asks once more.

"Yes." I respond, so that he doesn't have to worry any longer. I feel him pull my shirt up and bring it up by my wrists. He then unclasps my bra, leaving the top half of me bare. I moan as I feel his lips wrap around one of my nipples, and I instantly get the want to grab at his hair.

"Mmmm" I moan. He moves on to the other nipple, but continues pinching the one he had just abandoned.

"Please." I moan.

"Please what?" I can't help, but wiggle around wanting more.

"What do you want Anastasia?" He asks.

"Fuck me." I groan. I feel him smile against my breast, and then make his way down to the buttons in the front of my jeans. He unclasps them, and pulls them, with my panties, down my legs. Once he has them off, I gasp in shock as he automatically begins sucking on my clit.

"FUCK!" I can't help, but continuously try to pull away from the bed post. _I need to touch him_. I hear him pull down his pants, and just a few seconds later he's inside me. He is thrusting harder than he ever has before. _I need to touch him_. No matter how good this feels I don't understand what is happening. _Why are we doing this? What happened to just regular sex?_ I get this uneasy feeling, and I can no longer go along with this.

"Untie me." I whisper. He continues pounding against me, and I realize he didn't hear me.

"Untie me Christian!" I scream no longer being able to control the tears. I feel Christian pull out, and suddenly move fast to untie me. I sigh in relief as I no longer feel the pressure of the rope. I instantly pull off the blindfold and get off the bed.

"Tink-"

"Just give me a second Christian." I murmur. I turn around facing the lit the candles. _Why couldn't we just make love?_ After taking a few deep breaths I turn around facing Christian who is sitting on the bed. I subconsciously wrap my arms around myself, no longer wanting to be seen naked.

"Why'd you do that?" I ask.

"I-I just wanted to try something new."

"But why? Wasn't what we were doing enough?" Tears are constantly rolling down my face, and once Christian notices, he gets up and wraps me in his arms. _This is my Christian_.

"Of course it is Ana, I heard about this st-stuff, and thought we could try it. Spice things up." He laughs humorlessly. I pull apart from him just enough so that we can look each other in the eyes.

"You are never doing that to me again." I sob.

"Of course not Tink." Christian whispers as he pulls me back against his chest.

 **AN: Thanks for all of the amazing reviews. Until next time!**


	10. A Breath of Fresh Air

DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades Series used in this story belongs to E.L James

Chapter Eight: A Breath of Fresh Air

 **APOV**

 _Present/2015_

"So you and Sawyer have been quite the couple lately." Kate says with a smirk as she finishes up her mascara.

"Mmhmm" I respond knowing how she'll be digging for information in 3 .. 2 ..

"So is he good in bed? Come on Steele give me the details!" Kate yells.

I can't help but let out a hearty laugh. Kate has never been the kind to a) take no for an answer and b) never gossip. Kate has to know _everything_ , she's been that way since I can remember.

"We haven't slept together Kate." I whisper while staring at the ground.

"What? You guys are together like _all_ the time." She says in disbelief.

"Yeah well you don't always have to rush into that part of the relationship." I shrug. Once she finishes her makeup she makes her way to sit next to me on my bed.

"What's going on Steele?' She asks sincerely.

"Nothing I just … I just don't want to go as fast as I did with Christian. We all know how that worked out." I instantly feel Kate's arms wrapping around me, and pulling me into a hug. I rest my head on her shoulder, as she rests her chin on the top of my head.

"Christian was an idiot Ana, and Sawyer isn't Christian. Don't let Grey's fuck up ruin your relationships with a _really_ good guy." She whispers. I nod, and point out my pinky finger. Kate instinctively wraps her pinky around mine, something we've done since grade school.

\- Later's Baby -

"You're really not going to tell me where we're going?" I ask for the tenth time.

"Nope . That's why we call it a surprise." Sawyer laughs. I can't help but huff in frustration. Sawyer and I have been dating for a month, and I honestly can't believe how happy I am. Sawyer doesn't know the full story about Christian, but he does respect what I have told him.

Sawyer has been holding my hand, and rubbing his thumb against mine for pretty much the whole car ride. I do want to sleep with Sawyer, and this rubbing isn't helping anything, but I can't help but feel like I need to take it slow with him. My relationships with Christian moved pretty fast, and I don't want to fall too quickly again. I can't experience the pain I did with Christian.

"We're here." Sawyer states. I look up and gasp at the sight.

"How'd you remember?" I ask in disbelief.

"I never forget anything you say Anastasia." He whispers.

A couple weeks ago I told Sawyer how there was this one picnic table that I thought would be beautiful to eat at. I told him how amazing it would be if someone hung string lights, and you could just eat while watching the stars. Now here in front of me is my dream come true, I can already feel the tears forming.

"Thank you." I whimper. Sawyer wipes the tears now falling, and leans in for a kiss. While I am still getting over my break up with Christian, a girl could get used to this.

 **AN: Thanks for all of the amazing reviews. The next chapter that is based in the present will go more in-depth in Sawyer and Ana's relationship. Until next time!**


	11. Those Lucky Stars

DISCLAIMER: All of the characters from the Fifty Shades Series used in this story belongs to E.L James

Chapter Nine: Those Lucky Stars

 **APOV**

 _Past/Junior Year Semester One_

"What are you doing now?" I huff in response to his lips once again being pressed against my neck.

"You asked me this two minutes ago Christian." I whisper as I try to continue to type on my computer.

"Yeah but maybe the answer has changed." It takes everything in me to not moan, as his lips make their way down my neck.

"Christian, you and I both know that the answer hasn't. Now, stop trying to seduce, and let me finish this paper." I say in annoyance … well not in _total_ annoyance.

"Of course I would love to let you have your way with me, but I really need to get this paper done. Okay?" I giggle once I notice Christian's over-exaggerated pout.

"Fine." He huffs, and goes back to watching the football game.

"So when can I have my way with you?" I roll my eyes, and turn my head towards him.

"Christian!" He holds up his hands in front of him, and laughs.

"Okay okay. Hold your horses, excuse me for wanting to make love to my girlfriend." We stare at each other in silence, and he eventually goes back to staring at the screen.

I bite my lip in frustration, and it's not 100% at Christian. This semester has been kicking my butt lately, and this is not the first time that I've ignored Christian. Of course my academics come first, but at the same time it _is_ friday, and I have the rest of the weekend to get this assignment done. I put my computer on the coffee table, and turn towards Christian.

"Baby? Can you turn off the TV?" I ask. Christian immediately turns off the television, and focuses his attention on me.

"I'm sorry." I whisper while staring at the ground. I am pleasantly surprised as I feel his arms wrap around me, and pull me in close.

"No, I'm being an ass. I know you've had a lot on your plate, and I'm not helping." He whispers, as he gently places kisses on the top of my head.

"I love you." I whimper as he moves his hands to rub my center.

"Let me make love to you Ana. You deserve this break." I nod, as he starts taking off my cardigan.

He begins placing kisses along my body, as he makes his way down to my core. He is able to pull down both my jeans and underwear in one tug, and places a light kiss in between my legs.

"Christian" I groan.

"What do you want baby?" He murmurs. I tug onto his hair, and bring him back up to me so that we are now face to face.

"Fuck me." I moan, staring deep into his eyes. He quickly tugs off his pants and underwear, and before I know it, he is lining up his cock with me. He pushes in slowly, and once he is fully inside of me we both moan in pleasure.

Our movements are filled with so many emotions, so many words, yet we are absolutely silent. The only few sounds that can be heard are our bodies pressing together every time Christian thrusts. I feel myself getting close, and pull Christian's hair so that I can press my lips against his.

"Mmmmm" I moan against his lips. He picks up the pace, and by his labored breaths I realize that he is getting close too. He moves his head back a little bit so that we are eye-to-eye.

"Come with me Anastasia." Christian groans staring deep into my eyes. The way he's looking at me, the way he's making my body feel … this _intimacy_. It's all too much for my emotions, and soon enough I am in full blown tears by the end of my orgasm.

Christian brings his arms around me, and holds me in silence as I let out my tears. Every so often he places a kiss at the top of my head, or rubs his hands up and down my sides. When I am finally settled down he pulls away so that we can look at one another.

"What's wrong Ana?" He asks.

"I just love you so much. Sometimes I wonder how I could get so lucky, and feel like this must all be a dream." I whisper.

"I love you too Tink. I will _always_ love you, and it's not you who's the lucky one it's me. I don't deserve someone like you, and I just thank those lucky stars that I found you." He kisses me once more then rolls us over so that I'm on top. I don't know how long we stay in that position, still connected, but I could've stayed there forever.

 **AN: Thanks for all of the amazing reviews. Am I the only one having a very love/hate relationship with this Christian? Just a heads up I probably won't have a chapter up next week since it is Easter weekend. Until next time!**


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